It happens to most of us at some point. Understanding when you’ve hit the wall is the first step. Then, with the right strategy, it’s all upwards and on-wards. In this article we share some tips to get you back on top of things.
However you choose to phrase it – hitting a wall, burning out, breaking down – losing your sh*t really sucks.
Let me tell you, coaches lose their sh*t too! Earlier this year I hit a wall. Rather than starting off 2020 refreshed, energised and enthusiastic, I was in a slump. Worse still, I had no apparent reason to feel that way; my life is awesome! Knowing this only made things worse; I felt that my negative emotions weren’t warranted.
There are many reasons why we might lose momentum, sometimes to a point that we feel a sense of paralysis and despair. It’s important to recognise the signs and put some self-care into place to get back on track. Better still, keep in mind that through every break-down there is the opportunity to experience an amazing break-through!
In this article we share some insights into how to identify when you’ve lost your sh*t and make some suggestions for simple steps to get your sh*t back again!
What are the signs?
Self-awareness is a super-power that will equip you with the tools to make positive change in your life. Before being able to come up with a plan to get you out of a slump you need to be able to acknowledge that you are indeed in a slump. “Putting on a brave face” is an outdated tactic that was devised by a society ill-equipped to deal with the pressures modern life throws our way.
Some of the common behavioural signs of burn-out include:
· Lack of motivation
· Extreme procrastination
What might cause you to hit a wall?
Everyone who experiences losing their sh*t will have a different story, and every story is valid and important. It’s vital to heed your emotions and resist the temptation to make yourself wrong.
Once I noticed the signs of hitting the wall, it took me a while to work out that I was losing my sh*t because of my exciting, full life, rather than in spite of it. You see, this year I’m getting married, turning 50, expanding my businesses (x 2), running an awesome 5 day Retreat in Byron Bay, and planning a round-the-world working holiday… Choosing to pack a lot into my life is the way I love to live, but it can also sometimes be overwhelming.
Some of the common reasons that we might hit a wall:
· Being overworked
· Lack of rest
· Disconnection from goals and values
· Overwhelmed by commitments
· Difficult clients
· Personal struggles
· A combination of the above
Simple Tips To Help Get Your Sh*t Back
1. Recognise that you’ve lost your sh*t.
It’s OK and it will get better, but that can’t happen until you admit you’ve hit the wall.
2. Open up to a close friend or family member.
Be vulnerable and share your feelings with someone who you trust to have your back.
3. Give yourself a break!
Losing your sh*t doesn’t make you a failure, nor does it mean that you are powerless to change your situation. If you need to restructure life to get your sh*t back, make it a priority.
4. Make a list of things that are troubling you.
Write everything down. From personal concerns to business issues. Getting it out of your head and on paper makes you feel more in control.
5. Consider actions that might be able to resolve the easier issues.
Tick things off the list that you know you can sort out easily. Focus on clearing things from your mind that are causing you distress.
6. Practice GEM: Gratitude, Empathy, Mindfulness.
Hugh Van Cuylenburg writes about his philosophy of GEM for treating anxiety and depression in “The Resilience Project” (a worthwhile read).
Get out of the house and get active. Exercise releases all the good, positive hormones including endorphins, serotonin and oxytocin: this is nature's way of helping you get your sh*t back!
8. Make a plan for the bigger issues.
Get some help to put together a strategy for dealing with areas that can’t be solved immediately. Consider enlisting the help of a coach for professional issues, a personal trainer for health issues or a therapist for personal issues.
9. Take baby steps.
Start with time-blocking in your calendar. Commit to making positive changes and momentum will take over. Before you know it, your sh*t will be back.
I’m very happy to say that I’ve got my sh*t back (for now!) and I’m truly excited and grateful for the year that lies ahead. If you’re going through a tough time, make sure you reach out to someone close and let them help.
At this point we want to mention that if you are experiencing extreme distress, there may be underlying psychological reasons (such as clinical depression or chronic anxiety). If this is your situation, it’s important to seek professional help as soon as possible (your local GP is a great place to start). We have provided links below to Beyond Blue and Lifeline - these organisations help thousands of people out of trouble every day.
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Strive to be better, and always be kind.
The Resilience Project: https://theresilienceproject.com.au/
Beyond Blue: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/