How Stepping Away Saved My Sanity and My Business
“I Quit!”
As a small business owner, how many times have you thought this, or even shouted it out aloud?
Let me be honest. I’ve thought about quitting more than once.
I actually stepped away from my interior design business in 2016, following a horrible experience with a client, the breakdown of a business partnership and also losing one of my good friends to cancer. I’d lost my passion for design and I just didn’t have anything left in the tank to deal with all the stuff we have to deal with as business owners.
The trauma of watching my dear friend battle cancer was compounded by having to deal with a particularly difficult client who was impossible to please.
The final straw with this client came when she decided she didn't like the (spectacular) Spanish large format tiles (3000mm x 1200mm) that cost over $35,000, took 4 months to arrive (holding up the entire building schedule) and took a team of 4 highly skilled tilers 2 months to install into 4 bathrooms throughout the house.
These were tiles that she insisted she had to have, but once installed, she hated and demanded that all 4 bathrooms be stripped of the tiles, and replaced with something new. I've never seen a builder cry before, but at this news, he walked outside and burst into tears. The entire team had taken so much pride in the job, and we were all completely devastated.
At that particular time in my life, I couldn’t understand how some people (who have so much) are never happy with anything, no matter how beautiful, expensive and luxurious, while other kind and generous people have their lives prematurely stolen from them.
The world just stopped making sense.
The first thing I did was to end my contract with the client. I couldn't continue to work for someone who had such little regard for money, or the wellbeing of the team that was working so hard to build her dream home.
I didn’t know if I was quitting, or just taking a break. All I knew was that I needed to stop thinking about work for a while. Fortunately, the universe provided me with one of those miraculous breaks between projects, with nothing locked in to start and nothing remaining to finish. There were projects in the pipeline, but nothing had been confirmed.
I was faced with a choice. Do I push through, or do I quit?
At the time I really grappled with the feeling of quitting. I’ve never been someone who gives up and it felt like, after 16 years, I was selling out. Was I really prepared to throw everything away after all the blood, sweat and tears I’d invested into my business?
I soon worked out that the feeling of wanting to quit was a gift that shouldn’t be ignored, and stepping away from the business didn't mean I was quitting. In my case, this feeling was telling me to slow down, take a break, shift direction, or perhaps even move away from the business altogether.
My remedy was to take off to Europe for 3 months, forgetting about work, and allowing space to grieve the loss of my friend. I didn’t know if I would ever come back to my business, or if I would move in a completely new direction. Fortunately I had enough money to take this time off without having the added pressure of needing to worry about the financial implications of an extended break.
Ultimately I came back to the business, but not after a fair amount of soul searching. The break helped me clear my head and gave me the opportunity to rest, recuperate and really decide what I wanted to do.
It was during that period that another gift emerged: my new business The Design Coach.
After returning from Europe, I spent some time teaching at one of the design schools in Melbourne (where I met some of our beautiful TDC members!), and took a job as the “Design Boss” of a national design firm as the manager and mentor to over 90 designers around Australia.
Through this work I discovered my passion for coaching other designers about business processes; sharing all of the lessons I’d learnt over my many years of making mistakes!
Within a short period of time, I was also back designing. When push came to shove, I knew I didn’t want to stop doing what I genuinely loved: helping to connect people through beautiful design.
I’m so grateful for the break, because it helped me regain my passion. Since that time I’ve completed some of my most successful projects, including our Port Melbourne, Toorak and Mittagong Residences. Importantly, this success is now measured on things that matter most to me: my relationships with the clients, the journey along the way, and the level of pride I have in the finished project.
Now I have the best of both worlds. TDC has filled the part of my cup that had been missing. It’s given me community, a sense of contribution beyond anything I had done previously, and it’s also helped me to regain my love of design.
Beyond all else, I really believe that the best measure of success in businesses is how willing you are to push through the tough times and learn from the mistakes. It's certainly not all been a bed of roses since returning from my break, but I've gained a new perspective and have learnt to really lean into my values.
Have you ever been in a position where you wanted to quit?
My guess is that if you've been in business longer than 5 years, at the very least it's crossed your mind. Maybe you've even gone down the path of looking at your options, or stepped away from your business for a break, as I did.
Perhaps you’re currently feeling like you need a break from your business? It could be one of the best things you've ever done!
If you're looking at doing so, here's 5 things (from my personal experience) for you to consider before you do anything too drastic!
CONSIDERATION # 1: Work out the source of your discontent.
Is it something that can be solved within the business (such as sourcing new/different clients) or do you need to step away?
Perhaps getting to work "on the business" (rather than slaving away working "in the business") might help shift the discontent? If so, fast forward to CONSIDERATION #5...
CONSIDERATION # 2: Don’t move straight to “I quit!”.
It's quite distressing to think about closing the doors of your business, especially if you've spent many years nurturing it, and riding the highs and lows.
Rather than thinking that it needs to be such a definite end point, start by taking a break, to get some space and reassess. Even if you take an extended period away from the business, the business can just go on hold in the background.
CONSIDERATION # 3: Work out your finances.
At some point, reality needs to be considered. Money is important for the majority of small business owners, and should be a primary point of focus when making major decisions.
If you need a break, ensure you can afford to do so without an income. If not, you may need to find another source of income. Stay on top of your finances and create some forecast scenarios. The last thing you want to do is add to your stress by putting yourself in a difficult position financially.
CONSIDERATION # 4: Create a plan.
To have a break you'll need to wind down some projects, refer projects to colleagues and potentially move to fire some of your more troublesome clients.
Depending on the scale of your business, you might have team members to consider. While you need to prioritise your own health and wellbeing, there are ways to minimise the impact on your valued team members (like giving them plenty of notice to find alternate work, or even helping to find them new positions).
CONSIDERATION # 5: Ask for help.
There's so much to consider when making major life decisions like stepping away from your business. Talk to your accountant about your financial options, look to engage a coach to work out a plan, and lean on trusted friends for emotional support.
Remember that you're not failing, or being a "quitter" by choosing to step away from your business, whether it's for a short term or long term. For me, it was one of the most sensible and head-clearing things that I've ever done. It helped me to fall in love with design again, and certainly helped save my sanity.
I hope some of this has resonated with you today, and I’d love to hear your own stories related to the feelings of quitting.
Please write to tell me about what pushed you to the edge, and what brought you back again. As always, remember that we're here to help you navigate the sometimes challenging world of small business!
Stay well and always be kind.
Regards,
Andrew and the TDC Team
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